A Reality Television Moment... New York, Get a Real Job

Tiffany "New York" Pollard is one of the examples why reality television sucks. She was an unknown when she hit the scene on "Flavor of Love" with Flavor Flav, and she hasn't left since. After not being chosen during her first season, she returned a season later to be snuffed again for the prestigious role as Flavor Flav's girl (riiiiight). She then decided to go and seek out "love" in two failed attempts in a spin off dating reality show, "I Love New York". She then returned with "New York Goes to Hollywood", where she tried to get her acting career off the ground. But according to her, Hollywood was just too rough. Now she's back with "New York Goes to Work". Why?!

The new show, premiering May 4, will allow viewers to choose from a list of three possible job opportunities each week and vote via mobile phones by texting the job they would like to see her try. What?!

"Don't think it will be easy for Tiffany. She'll be worked, in all aspects of the job," according to the press release on VH1. "If she can impress her new employers, she'll receive a $5,000 bonus each week. But, if she quits, fails or gets fired, she'll get absolutely nothing." Sounds like winner television to me. How about if she does a good job, she gets paid a normal salary for an honest day of work? So, she'll make $5,000 on top of the deal she has with VH1?

I vote that she goes back to doing whatever she was doing before she was introduced to reality television. Can I get the text code for that? Get a real job New York.

A Reality Television Moment... Bret Michaels, What's Under That Hat?

Does anyone else think that Bret Michaels (former lead singer of Poison, VH1's Reality Show "Rock of Love") is pulling a Hulk Hogan (a serious receding hairline) under that hat and bandanna? Older promo photographs from the first season shows that he apparently has a full head of hair under there somewhere but he hasn't been quick to show in the last few seasons. I just think that dude is pulling a Hulk Hogan.

Red - I Should Tell Your Momma On You.....Oh yeah, he's homeless.

A friend just called me up and said I had to check this dude out on the internet. Said he's a homeless beatboxer and that his song is hotter than most of what he hears on the radio. Said that this dude is talented. So.....coincidentally, I just got home and was on my computer and to youtube.com I went. I gotta say, I think I agree. One man band man for real! Check it out...

Click to hear...
Red - I Should Tell Your Momma On You

LYRICS

------
Chorus
------
Now here we go again
me and my lonesome ass friend
spin up your dope fa sho' man I'm just sayin'
and I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you
me and my folks rollin' benz
we be so close, holdin' hands
kick in yo' door to show you I ain't playin'
I I I I I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you!

-------
Verse 1
-------
FOR WHAT?
for smokin' on that grand daddy!
make you wan' slap your grand mammy!
make you wanna hit that laffy taffy
wonderful, when i do it girl you make me happy
so we about to get hyphy wit it
you claim that you don't like me, quit it
after hours now I'm all up in it
and after that she keep me Nike fitted

------
Chorus
------
Now here we go again
me and my lonesome ass friend
spin up your dope fa sho' man I'm just sayin'
and I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you
me and my folks rollin' benz
we be so close, holdin' hands
kick in yo' door to show you I ain't playin'
I I I I I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you!

-------
Verse 2
-------
WHO ELSE?
Monaysha, Leigha, Sasha on ya!
Treasure, Smiley, Tasha on ya
Regina or Lil' Tina on ya
Sabrina or Kristina on ya
Stacy n' Tracy on ya
Cagney or Lacey on ya
Brianna or Bianca on ya
Lil' Tanya or Tatianna on ya
Cookie, Misha, Cora on ya
Secoya or Latoya on ya
Jasmine, Robin, Daisy on ya
Malaysia on ya', for you haters go get tailor on ya
and if you don't know go get coco on ya
sick me Donnie Bobo on ya
might just sick a hobo on ya
ya auntie and ya uncle on ya
you get me mad I have to chomp 'em on you
pass me the ball I slam dunk 'em on you
don't have me shoot my jumper on you!

------
Chorus
------
Now here we go again
me and my lonesome ass friend
spin up your dope fa sho' man I'm just sayin'
and I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you
me and my folks rollin' benz
we be so close, holdin' hands
kick in yo' door to show you I ain't playin'
I I I I I ain't playin' I should tell your momma on you!

---------
Breakdown
---------
FOR WHAT?
FOR WHAT?
I DIN' DO NOTHIN'
I DIN' DO NOTHIN'
I DIN' DO!
FOR WHAT?
FOR WHAT?
I DIN' DO NOTHIN'
I DIN' DO NOTHIN'

Creative Video... Rob Roy

Fur in My Cap (click to check the video) has been sitting on deck for a little while. Heard and seen a lot of buzz about it. It's also begun to be a DJ go to in the club (a few friends were twittering pretty heavy about it over the weekend). Not entirely sure still how I feel about the lyrical content (while it's different and unique) but hands down this is a really creative video. You've probably seen it floating around but figured I'd share it here too. Check out more Rob Roy at www.myspace.com/robroy. He has a very cool vibe overall. If you check the MySpace page, check out "Bowden Acres Parade". I'm feeling that. Something different. I dig it.

What I'm Listening to Right Now... Keri Hilson

Knock You Down feat. Kanye West & Ne-Yo (click to listen)

Times Must Be Tough

You never know what you're going to see with commercials. This is the extended version of the Burger King and Sponge Bob commercial featuring the remake to "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix-A-Lot. In the tv edited version, they cut to Sir Mix-A-Lot who says "booty is booty". I guess what he meant to say was "money is money". Times must be tough, so I guess you have to do what you have to do. Gives a whole new meaning to going commercial (not to say Sir Mix-A-Lot wasn't commercial prior to this).

THE BRIEFING: Zombies Attack

You're a photographer, following a celebrity that has asked you over and over to leave them alone, but yet you still follow. Then you yell random questions and comments to get a rise out of the person. What do you expect to happen? I'm pretty sure most people without anger issues would want to punch this person in the face. That TMZ crew are a bunch of interesting characters. Digging up everyones dirt, agitating folks and then surprised when someone grabs a camera that is inches from their face and smashes it on the ground. Can't be surprised.

It's kind of like that Katt Williams joke when the people are eaten by the tigers after going into the tiger's cage. How can you be upset with the realest person in the situation?

At the same time, I think Woody Harrelson is bugging for thinking folks are going to believe that he mistook the photographer for a zombie. What?! Woody, be real and say, "that dude pissed me off and I broke his camera. That's it. No further comment."

Check out the full story below from CNN.com. I thought it was pretty entertaining.

(CNN) -- Woody Harrelson defended his clash with a photographer at a New York airport Wednesday night as a case of mistaken identity -- he says he mistook the cameraman for a zombie.

The TMZ photographer filed a complaint with police claiming the actor damaged his camera and pushed him in the face at La Guardia Airport, according to an airport spokesman.

"We're looking into this allegation and if it's warranted, we'll turn it over to the proper authorities," said Port Authority of New York and New Jersey spokesman Ron Marsico.

The photographer, who was not identified, captured the encounter on a small camera after his larger one was broken. Harrelson, who is being sued by another TMZ photographer for an alleged assault in 2006, did not deny his involvement.

"I wrapped a movie called 'Zombieland,' in which I was constantly under assault by zombies, then flew to New York, still very much in character," Harrelson said in a statement issued Friday by his publicist.

"With my daughter at the airport I was startled by a paparazzo, who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie," he said.

TMZ.com posted two videos of the incident, including one recorded by the larger camera before it was damaged. The first video shows the photographer following Harrelson and his daughter down an escalator and out of the terminal. It ends with Harrelson apparently reaching for the lens. The second video begins with the photographer accusing Harrelson of breaking his camera. After Harrelson returns the camera to him, a scuffle appears to ensue.

"Woody, this is assault. Woody, this is assault," the photographer is heard saying. "Woody, chill out. Would you please chill out?"

The photographer continues to follow Harrelson for another four minutes as the actor and his daughter walk to the airport parking lot. At one point, Harrelson again turns toward the cameraman.

"I'm being chased by Woody Harrelson while I'm talking to you," the photographer says as he talks to an unidentified person on a cell phone.

"He hit me in my face, he broke my friggin' camera, he broke the camera in pieces," he said.
Harrelson, his daughter and a driver get inside an SUV and the encounter ends.

In the movie "Zombieland," Harrelson plays "the most frightened person on Earth" looking for refuge from zombies, according to the Internet Movie Database Filming on the movie wrapped in Atlanta, Georgia, on Wednesday, according to director Ruben Fleischer's Web site.

TMZ photographer Josh Levine filed a lawsuit against Harrelson last year for an alleged attack outside a Hollywood nightclub in 2006. Video of that incident, which is also posted on TMZ.com, also appeared to show Harrelson grabbing a camera and clashing with the photographer. Los Angeles prosecutors declined to press charges against the actor, but Levine filed a suit last summer asking for $2.5 million in damages.

"Woody Harrelson has a history of anger management issues with people and we intend to put a stop to this," Cyrus Nownejad, Levine's lawyer, said Friday.

The Easter Bunny Hates You!

I love this video. No lines. Just action. Hilarious. If I learned anything from these videos is that we need to stop commercializing Easter. Hahaha!!!

The Easter Bunny Hates You: The Prequel

The Easter Bunny Hates You: The Part 2

Yeezy Responds To South Park's Episode

Posted on 04.09.2009:
"SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT'S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER. I USE TO USE IT TO BUILD UP MY ESTEEM WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN ME. NOW THAT PEOPLE DO BELIEVE AND SUPPORT MY MUSIC AND PRODUCTS THE BEST RESPONSE IS THANK YOU INSTEAD OF "I TOLD YOU SO!!!" IT'S COOL TO TALK SHIT WHEN YOU'RE RAPPING BUT NOT IN REAL LIFE. WHEN YOU MEET LITTLE WAYNE IN PERSON HE'S THE NICEST GUY FOR EXAMPLE. I JUST WANNA BE A DOPER PERSON WHICH STARTS WITH ME NOT ALWAYS TELLING PEOPLE HOW DOPE I THINK I AM. I NEED TO JUST GET PAST MYSELF. DROP THE BRAVADO AND JUST MAKE DOPE PRODUCT. EVERYTHING IS NOT THAT SERIOUS. AS LONG AS PEOPLE THINK I ACT LIKE A BITCH THIS TYPE OF SHIT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. I GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME TO MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE I'M NOT ACTUALLY A HUGE DOUCHE BUT I'M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE. I'M SURE THE WRITERS AT SOUTH PARK ARE REALLY NICE PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE. THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO DRAW MY CREW. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY ALSO!! I'M SURE THERE'S GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THIS... THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S ME!"

Posted on 04.11.2009:
"SOUTH PARK pt. 3 I WAS AT CHEESECAKE FACTORY YESTERDAY AND THE MANAGER BROUGHT ME A PLATE OF FISH STICKS... (in a sarcastic tone) uuuuuuum, GREAT! : / "

For more, visit kanYe West's Blog.

Funny Pic... Respect the Hustle

Hey, I'm good but thanks for advertising. Saw this on the side of a bus and thought it was funny. Funny in the sense that I'm not a vegan but do you. Pushing the campaign at you via public transit. Gotta love it. I respect the hustle.

Quick Observation ... Getting things Repaired

I get things repaired from time to time. I'm sure you do too. I love explaining the problem, then the tech person tries it and says, "Oh you're right, that doesn't work." It's like, hey I know you need to check or whatever to determine what the issue is but don't talk to me like I'm an idiot. It's like they think you're lying or something. I told you it didn't work and there's no need to repeat it back to me in a semi condescending way. What's up with that? Ha.

My other favorite experience when you take something to get repaired is when the person repairing it says "I've never seen anything like this before". You're standing there like, damn I must have really broke this thing. Just a quick observation.

What I'm Listening to Right Now... Classified

DJ Hyphen mentioned dude on Twitter, so we went searching. Check out Classified, a Canadian underground rapper and producer. Both tracks come from Self Explanatory, his 11th studio album. Check it out.

Anybody Listening (Click to Listen)
Trouble (Click to Listen)
www.myspace.com/hiphopclassified