That Hurricane Chris
"Halle Berry" is another instructional dance piece of garbage from a ring-tone-personal-trainer-rapper.
As a matter of fact, allow me to put all ring-tone-personal-trainer rappers on notice (yeah, this includes you Soulja Boy). Stop making shit and take pride in your craft. Folks have made the argument that this type of music is entertaining and for teens (yet I see adults blasting it on a regular basis). I’m still trying to figure out who approved the Stanky Leg.
Sure, make music for the teens but does it 1) have to sound like this 2) always include some horrible dance? Can’t we give our youth a little more? Yes, I know most heads like a catchy hook and a beat you can rock to, but those things don’t need to come without creativity and talent. Hey, let’s just do it this way… let’s stop calling these cats rappers and they should never be included in a sentence with the words “hip-hop”, unless you are saying that it’s the direct opposite. Give them their own category and perhaps then I won’t say anything (can’t promise though).
“Download”, the newest from Lil Kim featuring T-Pain and Charlie Wilson is yet another example of why you shouldn't make a track about social networking. "...He wanna download me on his floppy disk"? Hmm, it's like this track was released a decade too late. Uh, hey Kim they invented flash drives while you were locked up. Good to know that Lil Kim is up on her google, MySpace and Facebook-ing. By the way with all due respect, Lil Kim is like five plastic surgeries past pretty © @OCSupreme. Please don’t download this garbage.
This week Ciara put out an album circa 1986-1992 Janet Jackson. She's decided to re-hit the scene with a look like Beyonce and a sound like Janet Jackson. I suppose originality is out in 2009. I’m wrong? You might want to re-listen to that “Love, sex, and magic”, as an example of what I’m saying. Perhaps she should have a wardrobe malfunction and it might push more albums.
Speaking of wardrobe malfunctions, on Thursday morning pictures of
Cassie breasts surfaced on the Internet (yeah, I looked). According to Cassie, "IT SEEMS THAT SOMEONE HAS HACKED INTO MY COMPUTER...THAT'S REAL FOUL AND EVIL. NOW STOP ACTING LIKE YOU HAVEN'T SEEN A TITTY BEFORE." Hacked her computer? What happened, she get hit with that conficker? Guess she wasn’t on a mac.
The truth is that we’ve seen many a celebrity nude before. Funny how celebrities never know how nude pictures and sex videos hit the surface, but boy do they seem to benefit from the extra publicity. With all due respect, publicity is a bitch and it seems like Cassie is all about it. Crazy haircut, check. Expose breast, check. Guess the home sex vid is next.
I think this was the internal convo… Cassie: How do I take the focus off Ciara's album? Answer: Email pics of breast from an anonymous source. Score: Cassie 1, Ciara 0.
We're losing thousands of jobs daily and what pops up on television? New York Goes to Work. They should have shelved this project indefinitely. Thanks again Vh1, you sure know how to churn out the winners. Viewers tune in weekly to see what type of job New York will do, and if she's successful with the gig she receives $10k. Talk about work grossly overpriced. Damn, she must have landed a gig at AIG with a bonus like that.
As music producer Nicolay put it on Twitter, "Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie did that shit eons ago and THAT already wasn't funny" (Damn, do you remember that show?) So, not only does Vh1 put on trash, they recycle. Good to know that they are running a green network.
Yeah I tuned in to bits and pieces of the first show (always looking for good blog material). The premier put New York in a position as an exterminator. Yes, definitely a tough gig for sure and not for everyone but in my opinion she failed overall at the task, yet they gave her the $10k anyway. Garbage! And to add insult to injury, if you want to vote on which job she'll do on each episode you can text in and cough over a $1 per text message. Pass.
Dear Networks: Don't report anymore about Bristol Palin or Levi. She’s not the only single moms out there w/ a baby daddy. And he damn sure ain’t the only dude with a little baby mama drama (raising my hand). They don’t need to be the spokesperson for shit and definitely not abstinence.
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